Saturday, December 29, 2012

Her Meaning

counsel, wisdom


derived from the word olive. The dove brought Noah an olive branch after the flood to prove to him that there was life after destruction. A sign of life.

Words and their meanings have always been very important to me. Though some may use words such as like and love, pretty and beautiful as synonyms, to me, they are worlds apart when it comes to what they actually mean. I love the depth of vocabulary.
When choosing our children’s names, it was important to me to have deep meanings behind those combinations of letters that they would carry for the rest of their lives. I wanted the characteristics of those names to reflect what we would pray they would grow into.
Some parents pray for their daughters to be beautiful, to be kind, to be a lady. Though I believe she was all of those things and more, I desired Quinn to be a baby, a girl, a woman, of wisdom.

A woman who made sound choices and thought with purpose, who had a deep understanding of the world around her.

A girl whom others would look to for advice and counsel.

A lady who was wise.

To us as parents, this is the trait we would be most proud to see our girl live out. 

On the morning of September 13th, we dedicated our little girl before we said goodbye forever. We entrusted her back to God, to the place from which she came, and let go of the gift that we had been so briefly blessed with. We could not dedicate her life to him, as she already danced in the place where she was created to be, so we dedicated our lives instead. We dedicated ourselves to being parents that Quinn would be proud of. We dedicated ourselves to trusting God, though we wanted to lash at him with raw anger at the betrayal we felt. We dedicated ourselves to being changed because of our little girl.  

And so now, I am not the woman I once was. She has altered me forever and my baby is still teaching this mommy many things. She is teaching me wisdom. Quinn is teaching me to search for knowledge and thirst for truth. Her spirit has made me desire to be what I prayed for her. In her perfection, she reflects the one who made her. I can only hope that because of her, I am able to portray a small glimmer of Christ’s spirit. 

I pray that each of my children, and the names we choose for them will do the same.

1 comment:

  1. Simply beautiful, I had goosebumps while I read this. I cherish the approach you and Daniel have boldly chosen to take in this journey, we are all blessed because of it.

    This also makes me realize I really should have reconsidered the name we gave Landon - Long Hill, Jacob - wrestles with God, great, have we invited a lot of struggle?! ;)